Category Archives: Uncategorized

Why is it that we are always in pain, is it something that we like or something that we deserve? No matter what we think; no matter what we say, we derive certain pleasure from being in this state of feeling pained. It makes us aware of our presence and I guess that’s what makes us realise the importance of little yet frequent moments of  Happiness. I’ve somehow come to the conclusion that people like being part of this act of Masochism; deriving pleasure from our own pain.

Do we need a reason to feel pain? Well, not really. We are capable of feeling it just by triggering our senses. Pain can be derived physically, mentally or emotionally. People moreover prefer the last one, this being the easiest one to realise I guess.

What’s the purpose of all this agony? I can’t tell, even when I sometimes like to think that I’m hurt and pained by someone or something. But I don’t think that it’s particularly bad. Its actually useful, but only if this pain is borne and felt in solitude, where only you can contemplate on its cause & effect and how it helps us. Comprehending the reason of our being and confiding in our self when in need…

-Self

Dil aaj kuch udaas hai,
Najaane kya baat hai,
Shayad kisi ke intezaar mein,
Ho raha ye Nirash hai

Kyu essa hota hai,
Nadaniyo mein kyu ke khota hai,
Kitna bhi samjhao isse,
Phir unhi raho ki aur rukh modta hai

Aaj phir woh dard utha,
Jiski na mujhe talaash thi,
Par kehna nahi manta ye kambakht,
Ye dard shayad umeed ka ek ehsaas hai

Ab apne bas mein toh kuch nahi,
Karne deta hu isse mannmani,
Asha hai ye sambhalega,
Meri iss udaasi ko ye samjhega…

-Self

I was born on this very day,
Born 27 years ago,
This day comes every year,
When I fare the previous year ado

Every year its just a routine,
Routine of getting wishes,
Routine of returning the same,
But this year it was different game

Friends gifted me something,
Gifted me some unique memories,
Memories that can be preserved,
Memories previously unseen & unheard

I don’t know what I did different,
Different from last time,
Sure enough I don’t deserve it,
Amazed I am for this new life line

Where would I go with all this affection,
All this love directed my way,
I guess I will bask in this sunshine
While it lasts, while it stays…

-Self
(24th November)

No matter how practical you seem to be, no matter how objectively you think, when it comes to the matter of heart you always tend to flow with the emotions and forget about all the technicalities which were once holding you & acting as a shield against the cruel yet thriving world. Now the question arises, Is this the right thing to do? It’s not like we’ve an option here, but it’s worth pondering over this question.

I’ve myself been part of such a conundrum, realizing it beforehand that it would make me think irrationally at times, yet I fail to figure out the reasoning behind it. Perhaps, it’s the enduring feeling of love, getting to know someone closely and sharing part of your being, your soul with him/her, or maybe the feeling/fear of losing someone which makes us act erratically. Emotion after all is the most powerful factor which guides us in our decisions.

Moving on from the argument of this phase being right or wrong, we have to realize whether it’s worth the while. I believe that if it helps you pass your day on even a slightly better & positive note, it’s absolutely worth it. For me, sight of her smiling, voice of her laughter, watching her feel joyous while at work, makes my day. We don’t know whether there’s a life after death, why don’t we find our heaven here itself then? Personally, it’s fine to me if she’s not with me for this life time, although it pains me to even think that, all that matters is for her to be happy which in-turn will make me feel blissful. It might seem selfless act of love at first, but there are only few deeds that are more selfish than this because this moreover soothes your soul and it is you who gets a purpose out of it; purpose being his or her happiness and prosperity.

-Self

Behold the beauty of nature’s creation,
Every bit every particle is whole,
Purity is its soul,
Truth is its story untold,

Heart melts at the sight of it,
Soul blends in with its melancholy,
Helpless spirit does nothing but wander,
In search of such a beauty to own,

Uniqueness is its bitter truth,
Randomness is its only goal,
Trying to get hold of this rare a beauty,
Leaves me stranded all alone, all alone

-Self